Buhtt sex?
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize