i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
