Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
