Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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