i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
