my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
