the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
