I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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