I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
