O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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