Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
