Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
She's JV to your varsity
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
