Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
