break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
