are you so shy because you have an std?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Randomize