So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
