i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
