i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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