btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize