i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
