she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
