dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
