I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
