If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Randomize
