I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I just googled if crying burns calories
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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