like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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