Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
