Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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