He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize
