One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
