Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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