i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
