69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
where are you?
Hypothermia
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
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