There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
