He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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