imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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