Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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