im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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