its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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