Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
