dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
We talked him into tasing himself.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
