That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
