He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
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