all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
