Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Randomize
