'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Randomize
