'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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