Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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