she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Randomize
