Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
