I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Randomize