Porn is love you can see.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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