Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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